I am glad like our computers, we do have something like a restart in our lives. But when the word restart is used for starting from the scratch, you feel hurt. In 2006, I started my journey of medical problem, almost gave two years, finally resigned in 2008 but recovered by mid of 2008.
My father called an hour back and asked me a question, "Why do I feel you are hiding something from me? You talk about it to your mother but not to me. You feel, I might not understand or feel bad about it."
I smiled over the call and just wiped my tears. You know what, "I am fine."
It gives happiness when a lie can make your loved ones relaxed and happy. As such also people cannot help me at this point but being happy will at least give them a contentment. I am 5 weeks away from recovery but as per my doc, it will take almost a year to have a normal life. I resumed my activities from Monday. I started gymming from today. But everything is not the same or maybe will never be the same.
But I have learned a fact - smile in pain is all time better than crying with pain. It makes a lot of difference. I might not be the same person or daughter or wife for my family but I will try as I have restarted from where I was in 2006. It hurts, indeed it hurts very badly, I am back to 0. But I will still not give up as if I give up, I die before I actually die. I swim 2500 m daily, walk 6 km at a very slow speed, and light workouts. But yes the pain travels with me all that while. Still I do not stop myself.
Though things will never be the same again for me but a hope of being fine lives within me, each day.
At times, I get up at 2 am and cry with pain. But then sleep with my tired eyes. This is a sign that there is a hope to fight and to recover.
You only lose when you give up in life. You fail when you stop trying in life. The easiest thing to live is Just Live.....to Live!
In the famous words of SRK, we fall in love only once, we get married only once and we live only once.
In nutshell, it is only once as we get only one life....
