I AM PROUD TO BE A WOMAN - HAPPY WOMEN'S DAY!!!

Happy Women’s Day and just follow few things as I share about myself. I am sure whenever we do something we prove a trait that God gave us as a woman. If I am asked someday whether I would like
to be reborn as woman? Without a single thought I would loudly and proudly say ‘YES...NO DOUBTS”. I have an interesting journey like many other women but somewhat unlike many other women. I share few quick points of my journey that might be helpful to some of my women readers and if you are in the same situation today as I was years/months/days back then read the following.

I was the second girl child and trust me 30 years back it was not a very comfortable idea for my grandparents. My parents were happy but my grandparents were definitely not. We lived in a joint family and so my brother siblings and my real sister were happily accepted but I was not. Then came a day after 18 years of ignorance, when my father’s dad slipped and broke his ankle there was nobody to take him to the doctor. My brothers were busy in their worlds. I took him and since that day I became the apple of their eyes. On his death bed he whispered “Archu beta – I am sorry for what I did”. I miss him today a lot. I realised one thing about being a women – you can change the world around you with your behaviour. You have the capability to earn love with your caring attitude.

My family is not open to the idea to learn dance particularly ‘Kathak’. They have their own reasons and I never accepted those reasons. ‘Kathak’ was and is my life. In 1998, my dad came to know that I go for Kathak classes after my college. Yes, I used to lie as telling the truth meant a big ‘NO’. I tried convincing him but always failed so I thought not to tell and hide it from everyone. But it did not worked for a long time as I used to get late and one day my gungroos were traced in my bag. I was told to quit it or was given an option if I continue I had to fund my entire education fee which meant – university fees, NIIT fees and other expenses. I took it as a challenge and for 4 years I worked as a home tutor post my college and Kathak classes. Where my friends used to watch movies and hang out, I used to travel at different places to lend sessions and gather funds for my education. I funded my graduation, NIIT Certification and MBA. I am very proud that I also could get certification in Kathak. A woman has the capacity of multitasking and she can make her dreams come true with her courage and clarity of objectives in life. If you are still thinking you want to make your dreams come true then GO AND JUST DO IT!!!

I have no real brother so I wanted to retain my maiden name ‘Kapoor’. I just do not understand that when I lived with an identity of ‘Archana Kapoor’ for 26 years, how can I let it go so easily? It might not make a difference to the world but yes a lot to me. Others might not bother but to connect to my achievements (like certificates, medals that are on the name of ‘Archana Kapoor’), I have to keep my name as ‘Archana Kapoor Nagpal’. I am lucky my partner supported me BUT just like many of my friends who are going through the same journey now his family was not comfortable. I struggled for 2 years to convince them and my passport was not made just for a reason that why ‘Kapoor’. Looking at the love of his family for me, I thought to take off ‘Kapoor’ from my name. What is bigger than happiness of my people? If removing ‘Kapoor’ gives my family happiness, I will remove. But by that time PAN CARD was issued and my professional records at the firm were fixed so it was hard to take off ‘Kapoor’. I guess GOD also wanted my wish to be fulfilled. When his family came to know that I was ready but things are not favourable, they happily allowed me to keep it the way I want. One more learning – A woman has a sacrificing nature that is like a key to her all hurdles. When we can do things without confrontation then only we enjoy the sweetness of our wishes.

I am very proud to address myself as a sponsored mother. I am more proud that my partner stood with me in this. Although, my and his family are not in the favour of this act of sponsorship. They have never asked us how is our daughter?J
No regrets as I respect their opinions and being a woman we have one more trait – live your life on your terms. If you think what you did gives you the power to face yourself into the mirror, then you are on the right way. Many friends have said there is a difference when your biological child cries and when a sponsored/adopted. For biological you will leave everything around but for the latter you can be little ignorant. This is not true. A woman is a mother by feeling not by physiology. The day I came to know my daughter was tested for HIV as a protective measure, I CRIED. And I asked GOD the results should be negative. So many women on FB has opted ‘Mother Teresa’ as ‘Who inspires you’. Then think she was a mother in the real sense - Mother by feelings not by biology. To all the women how often you followed ‘Mother Teresa’. Other than charity organised through corporate, did you ever spend some time at an orphanage or a NGO. Think!!!

Another trait of woman – Be a mother by feelings first then by biology!!!

I salute all such women who support this cause.

It is only a woman who can surrender her desires and needs at different stages of her life in different
relationships. When I quit my job, I was unhappy. But today when I am able to give time to my home, I feel like queen. I worked for 8 years and was well paid but the satisfaction, I get working for my home is much above that. My increments and titles like ‘Queen of Foreign Languages’ during my professional tenure are too small when my people appreciate me for good food and well decorated home. Another trait of woman – she excels in every field as she has deep satisfaction within herself.

A special salute to all homemakers, you really make house a home.

Have a special women’s day. BE PROUD TO BE A WOMAN AND LOVE YOURSELF