This post is a story that is published on one of the websites. I hope my FB friends would have read. The reason I post it today is I am reading a book – The Art of Forgiveness. I can relate to the book as I wrote my real life story couple of weeks back on the same note. I realised that 17th June is approaching and I am going to complete a year of my medical journey. Though it has been 9 years but the real down started last year.
But before you read this post just a thought – “If you cannot forgive you burn the bridge that may be the one you have to cross later.”
If I can forgive, anyone can. Though with forgiveness, I have moved away from all the people who have hurt me but with no signs of rancor. It gives me peace and I feel heavenly. I do not believe in looking back so I asked for forgiveness – granted or not does not matter. My job and God’s will is ‘to ask’ that matters rest all is not your cup of tea. At the same time I forgave everyone for everything not for them but for my peace. Trust me – learn to forgive and then you will see how life changes. Let it go off. Be Human!
Below is the story, actually my real life incident. Hope it makes one person to ask for forgiveness and many to forgive.
"Sometimes forgiving was easy for me; sometimes forgiving was a very bold choice. Whatever kind of choice it was, it always led me to a more peaceful heart. It always left me happier and free to move on to create healthier relationships with others and with myself." - Robin Casarjian
Principle of Life: Forget-Forgive-Move On
Each one of us does not possess the art of forgiving. We might lack the strength to forget things and forgive others.
On 17th June 2010, the day I was diagnosed with Osteoarthritis, things have drastically changed around me. The first and foremost thought that came to my mind was to ask for forgiveness from all those, I might have hurt at some point of time in my life. I questioned my own self whether I was doing the right thing. And my heart answered for me that forgiveness is for you not for others.
My mind was restless as so many questions were bothering me.
1. Will my friends ever forgive me?
2. Will they be able to recall me after so many years?
3. How would they react to my apology letter?
4. Is this a good apology letter for an old friend?
There were a few people I never contacted since 13 years. But I was firm to do this for my mental peace before I start afresh.
I created a list of all the names and tracked their email ids. Some were available on Facebook, the best source to track friends and message them. It was difficult to customise my apology letter but the best decision was to draft a general letter. The idea was to convey my apology without emphasising what made me to write the letter.
As per the list, I started sending emails and letters to all the friends. I remember how I felt while sending those emails and letters. There was a big fear how would people react to my apology. Moreover there were certain friends who disconnected though I never did anything wrong to them. But when you ask for an apology you do not argue with yourself whether I was right or wrong.
The responses to my apology were shocking. Most of them forgave me. Whereas few never responded to my apology and others called me names. Maybe this was the best way they could handled my apology letter.
But there was a friend of mine who wrote something that touched my heart. I felt as if I deserved what I am going through.
He wrote, “Well, this letter is a surprise to me. If you remember 6 years back, I also asked for an apology for whatever happened between us and you left me. Moreover you took me off your Facebook as well. I cannot express how I felt. I felt strangulated as I could not clarify my part to you. I can understand how low you would be feeling while writing this apology letter. I will not behave in the same way as I value you as a friend. I forgive you for my peace and happiness. When you forgive someone, you are not doing it for others but you are doing it for yourself. It will give me immense satisfaction that you are back in my life as a friend and things are solved. It is true to grant forgiveness is the most difficult task. When we forgive others we do it for ourselves as it will give us peace, satisfaction and happiness. The more we are inclined to hold grudges, the more we make our soul suffer. We would always be driven to negative thoughts in such instances. To move ahead in life we have to forget things and forgive others.”
His words were so soothing that I could never forget them. I realised what I did to him and how easily he forgave me.
I understood that forgiveness is an art. One should learn to forgive others to make his life easier. Time is great healing factor and forgiveness gives us pleasure to live a happy, contented and peaceful life. If you are still thinking to forgive your friend or not, then do not take too long. Your forgiveness is a gateway to your happiness and peace. It takes a strong person to say sorry, and an ever stronger person to forgive.
A simple rule of thumb in life is that if you cannot forgive others then do not expect others to forgive you. We all are human beings and are born to make mistakes. If God can forgive us for our bad deeds why cannot we forgive others?
Make it a principle of your life – Forget, Forgive and Move On!
