New Year 2011

Well, the year 2010 is about to end in an hour. Guess what my husband has a night shift and I am thinking to party tomorrow. When you guys would be sleeping under the hangover effect I would be doing what you guys are doing now. Year to another year life really runs or time just flies.

HE held my hand six months back and asked me to live in moments. There is no life that you think is to be lived around days, months and years. ‘HE’ is nobody but my doctor who diagnosed me with Osteoarthritis.

If we go by medical history this is a very unusual case as there are not many women or I must say people suffering from this disorder at the age of 29. When I heard this I could not believe and I asked my doctor couple of times “Are you sure?” I felt my reports are exchanged with someone of the age group 45-60 years as the ageing process does not start at 29. I consulted the other doctor (known as the best in AP and among first five in Asia) but he also came with the same solution “we have no cure for you”. There is one woman in the number of 2000 who suffer from this disorder at this age. Probably, as he felt I was born with this disorder. I was prescribed with few medicines that I have to live on. He said “Your case is not that bad but yes you have to live with this as we cannot revert what has been damaged”. In short, I understood I will die with this. I went into trauma and was put onto depression pills. So many negative energies captured me that I sincerely thought of ‘mercy killing’ rather than living in pain that too lifelong. There were indeed there are days when I am as perfect as others but yes then there are days when walking few meters is difficult. There are beautiful days when I feel to avoid medicines but then there are days that these medicines make my life beautiful.

One day while crossing the road I read something that changed me “All of us might not be able to do Everything but each one of us can do Something”. I understood what my doctor meant when he said you do not have days or months or years to cherish indeed cherish every moment. I was missing the significance of ‘Something’ as my control of mind was around ‘Everything’. The first thing I realised was for so many days these depression pills were fighting for me. People were troubling with deliberate question like “Why no kids?”, “You limp?” etc and I used to take a pill. I have to fight for myself so I threw all the pills in a bin. First thing is to accept what is reality.

I framed my mind that today is the last day of my life, live it fully. There is no tomorrow for me. I changed everything around me with this scenario – Life is Beautiful, Live it Beautifully. Why do we need to think I will wear this dress on my birthday, it is just like any other day. Wear it today. Why will I shop only for Diwali or why should I enlighten my house on Christmas, why not today. I learnt not to live my life as per occasions. Make every moment an occasion.

When I look back I see so many beautiful moments that I wasted because I was like many of you waiting for the right occasion. You want to gift your wife a wrist watch then do not wait for her birthday as sometimes surprises are really appreciated than gifts on occasions.

Similarly, I am no more a ‘New Year’ person. I am not one of those who wait for 31^st to drink or party with friends as I believe in a small quote

“New Year's eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights”

So New Year’s eve is just like any other night enjoy every evening as if it is a ‘New Year’s eve.

I have shared my story today as I do not want my readers to live life in days or months or years but in moments that make your days or weeks or months special.

Happy New Year 2011

Aspirin - Willow Tree Extracts

I read about Aspirin today on MSN. Since I am on something similar medication I thought to read and know more about Willow Tree Extracts. I thought to share this article. For my friends on FB, I have already shared the article link.

I am using the content of the article for my readers so that you do not miss on this. It might be useful for someone out there. This is my post under ‘From My Library’. Please this is just to read and know about Aspirin as a useful drug.

Aspirin has been humanity's wonder drug. Extracts from the willow tree have been used for pain relief in folk medicine since the time of the ancient Greeks. By 1897 a synthetic derivative (acetyl salicylic acid) of the plant's active ingredient (salicin) was created. This allowed aspirin to become the most widely used medicine in the world.

In recent years its benefits as a blood-thinning drug have led to it being prescribed in low doses of around 50mg to reduce deaths from stroke and heart attack. There were also hints that aspirin may help prevent some cancers. But these were mostly based on observational studies, which can be misleading.

The gold standard of scientific evidence is the randomised controlled trial, preferably one with a lot of peo ple and held over a long time. The results of just such a trial, published in the Lancet, suggest that aspirin is indeed an astonishing drug. Peter Rothwell at the John Radcliffe Hospital in Oxford and his colleagues looked at deaths due to cancers during and after randomised trials of daily aspirin. The trials had actually been started to look at how useful aspirin was for preventing heart attacks and strokes. Nevertheless, the data from the 25,570 patients enrolled in eight trials was also revealing about cancer.

In trials lasting between four and eight years, the patients who had been given aspirin were 21% less likely to die from cancer than those who had been given a placebo. These results were based on 674 cancer deaths, so are unlikely to represent the kind of statistical oddity that can beset studies on cancer risks that sometimes create headlines.

Who Matters To Me?

This year has been a turning point in my life. I might be busy for the next two days as the year ends but before that I felt to thank many for their good and bad contribution to my life this year.

One of my close aunt sent me a text message today morning that triggered the idea of this post.

Thanks to those who hate me or called me names. All those who cursed me and believed I am not a ‘woman of values’ or ‘trustworthy person’. You all made me stronger. You made me raise my levels much above you could have expected. With no hard feelings and grudges, I thank you for your contribution to my life this year. Your criticism is my biggest strength.

Thanks to those who loved me as they made my heart bigger. They made me fight with the worst situations of life with courage as I felt it would be unfair to let them down.

Thanks to those who cared as they actually let me know they cared for me.

Thanks to those who left me as they made me realize that nothing lasts forever. They helped me to understand who are my people, I can rely in this lifetime.

Thanks to those who entered my life as they made me who I am today.

I want to start my new year with people who have done so much for me this year and with a very clear note.

“Those who cannot see me when I am visible does not matter to me anymore. Those who can see me when I am invisible are indispensable for me”.

Video From Sphoorti - Christmas 2010 and New Year 2011

I visited Sphoorti (www.sphoorti.org) around Christmas. We have 92 children in this NGO in the age group of 4 to 14 years.

I have captured a video for all my readers. These children have sent their wishes for all of you for Christmas 2010 and New Year 2011.

Please follow the youtube link to view the message.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iLeI9YC5W4

What Can He See Through The Window?

There were two patients in a General Ward. Their beds were adjacent to each other named as Bed A and Bed B separated by a white curtain to maintain their privacy.

Bed A was facing the entrance whereas Bed B was next to a window.

Bed A patient was somewhat jealous of Bed B as he wanted to be next to the window and feel the breeze, see the beauty outside that might relieve him of his pain. To fulfil his ego he started interacting with the Bed B patient and gradually used to ask what he can see outside through the window. He made sure he asks this many times in a day so that Bed B patient gets irritated and change his bed with him.

Bed B patient being calm and ignorant to Bed A patient’s ideas used to describe all that he could see through the window, lying down on the bed. He used to explain each and every instance in such a beautiful manner that Bed A patient used to forget his pain and feel relieved.

One morning Bed A patient got up and he found Bed B patient missing. He wanted to again trouble him and ask the same question again “What can he see through the window?”

He called for the nurse and enquired about Bed B patient. To which he was told that he passed away last night.

He was sad but at the same time he felt that now he can take that bed and see all the beautiful things around - chirping birds, blue sky and green plants with orchids around.

He requested the nurse to shift him to Bed B and it was fulfilled with no hassles.

The moment he laid down he pulled the curtain and was shocked to see that there was nothing outside the window. The window was facing the wall of the other section of the hospital. There were no trees, no orchids, no blue sky and no green plants as he was always told.

He felt bad for himself that all these days he troubled the other patient so that he gets this bed and that same person created a beautiful world to relieve him of his pain. He spent time in creating something that does not exist to give him happiness but now it is too late for him to apologise also.

Moral of the Story

We sometimes do not realise what others have done for us. They might have invested time, energy and may be money to give us happiness. They might have gone out of the way to bring a small smile on our face. Respect them. If you cannot do good to people do not bad as well. We all have our battles and others might be going through a tough battle than yours.

Design and Layout

I would like to give little insight to my blog and the content posted on it. Let me give a quick description of the Design and Layout of my blog.

Under the title ‘So You Think You Are Living’, you can visit my profile.

To make it easier for the readers I have selected the ‘Label’ option that appears on the right side of the main page. Currently, I have five labels as listed below. These labels are mainly the index to the blog.  When I accomplish a post and before posting the same to the blog I select a suitable label under which it would appear. I am giving a description and purpose of each ‘Label’ below. I have plans to add more ‘Labels’ to my blog.

Background – This is mainly to explain to my readers why do I blog? What made me to blog again? This is solely my writing inspired by my real life only.

For My Readers – This label will include posts and updates for my readers. It will include my feedback to the readers in case they need additional clarification around their suggestions or comments.

From My Library – This label is solely to share the content that I read in some other book or on net via forwarded mails, self-help stories etc with my readers. The posts under this label are not my writings but inspired by readings that I feel to share and redraft for my readers.

Real Life Chapters – These are my real life stories or incidents that I discovered in my lifetime. I express these incidents as stories with a moral for my readers to learn. They are solely inspired by real life experiences and had nothing to do with other writings.

What I think – This label will mainly have posts around my thoughts about a particular instance or subject. We come across many situations in our daily lives from where our thoughts are nurtured. I write content around my thoughts and post them under this label.

Below every post there is a tab to post ‘Comment’. Readers can post their feedback and suggestions as a part of the comments. If you feel to share the post with your friends you can select any of the options from the tabs (Email, Blog, Twitter, Facebook and Google Buzz) adjacent to the ‘Comment’ tab.

What He Valued Most?

This is a story I read today and felt to share as a part of the label ‘From My Library’.

(Courtesy : 100 Minutes Can Change Your LIfe)

A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door. It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man.

College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday." Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"
"Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral,"
Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?” Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tellme was 'the thing I value most,'" Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home fromwork one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.

"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover.

Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack Thanks for your time!
Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said.

"Oh, by the way, Janet...thanks for your time!"

To All My Readers

Well to all my readers this is a new label just for all of you.

Whenever I post anything to my blog, I make sure to post it through the blog to my FB wall as well. I have been very lucky as I get so many comments on my FB for my posts. I appreciate the time you readers spend in reading my post and commenting on them. I really feel blessed when I see a thumb of like against my link or status in my FB account.

I am equally thankful to those who post comments directly on my blog. Though I approve some of them as few are too personal to be shared and they are very special so I want to keep in my blog account only.

But today I am immensely thankful to a special reader who has left a comment for my latest post (http://doyouthinkyouareliving.blogspot.com/2010/12/i-can-make-you-feel-better.html) with some useful suggestions. (Comments appear at the bottom).

I would share this comment with all my readers as a part of this post as you feel good when you are appreciated and you like to share your happiness with those who have made it possible. You all are responsible for all the appreciation I got.

If I would have been emotional like few months back a tear would have rolled over my cheek after reading your comment.

But being highly practical person I take the pride to thank you and I will definitely update my profile on my blog along with a new label as ‘About Archana’ for all readers soon.

Rest I will make sure to write about me in detail as a post sometime so that my readers can connect to me as a person.

Thanks to all for your comments on my blog and FB. I am looking forward to more suggestions.

Learn From Mistakes

When I was six, my father used to tell this short story. Being so young and then moving to teens, I was never bothered how valuable it would have been in the coming years. Today, when I am left with little to live I remember this and personally feel that this needs to be shared on my blog. Thanks papa for all this, although I am late to convey my thanks.

Edison tried two thousand different materials in search of a filament for the light bulb. When none worked satisfactorily, his assistant complained, "All our work is in vain. We have learned nothing."

Edison replied very confidently, "Oh, we have come a long way and we have learned a lot. We now that there are two thousand elements which we cannot use to make a good light bulb."

I realised that if we do not learn from our mistakes at the right time we tend to repeat them that make us vulnerable. Again it depends how we perceive a situation and we learn from it. Just give a thought in the above text. The assistant perceived a negative learning from the entire task whereas Edison was too optimistic towards the whole process and his learning.

This post might trigger the confidence of those who could not gather the courage to learn at the right time. It is never too late to learn and restart rather not to learn from mistakes.

Problem May Not Be With The Other One

In my home library, one of my favourite book is “Chicken Soup for the Soul”. I have almost read all the writings of Jack Canfield (Inspirational Self Help Author and Success Coach). While reading through one of his latest book, I came across this story and this is my pick from my library for this week. I will try to add more posts under this label. I will pick one story from library collection each week.

A man feared his wife wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

Here's what you do," said the Doctor, "stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den. He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens." Then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?"

No response.

So the husband moves to closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Still no response

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again he gets no response so,

He walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?"

Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her.  "Honey, what's for dinner?"

...................................................................................................................................................

"James, for the FIFTH time I've said, CHICKEN!"

Moral of the story:

The problem may not be with the other one as we always think, could be very much within us..!

I have ‘Attitude’ but I am not ‘Arrogant’

It is rightly said that ‘Ego’ at the right place and time is ‘Attitude’ and ‘Attitude’ at wrong place and time is ‘Arrogance’.

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to most us, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, then circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think, say, or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.

We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitudes.

Hold attitude but without arrogance. It feels good to hear that I have ‘Attitude’ but I am not ‘Arrogant’.

Why I Started Blogging Again?

The concept behind ‘So You Think You Are Living’ is my life and how it changed since 14^th June 2010. The spice jet flight from Delhi to Hyderabad although delayed by 4 hours due to unexpected rains gave me an idea to start blogging again. I still remember the storm of thoughts that passed through my mind to my heart capturing my each nerve and artery until I completely lost my control and tears starting rolling over my cheeks. I agree I was a lily-livered emotional woman at that point of time until HE came and sat next to my seat.

Surprisingly, who is that ‘HE’, I myself do not know but I am sure that day he boarded the flight for me as he was late to board and all passengers were waiting for my ‘HE’. He was in his mid 40s tall, dark, Telugu guy. I never asked him any questions as I was engrossed in my own thoughts but I answered his questions as he sounded like someone who wanted to lend an ear and a shoulder to cry. I regret as I will never be able to locate ‘HE’ but I am sure if Life gives a second chance we might meet again may be at the Airport or in Hyderabad.

The moment plane took off he asked me as if he was waiting for the take off “why are you crying lady?” This was followed by complete silence from my end. Usually, this is the way I respond on such questions. Another question “Are you fine or shall I call the steward”? I responded “I am fine and please let me be myself for a while”. He said “No problems just thought to check if you need any help”. I do not know but at this I looked at him and said “I have lost everything that means everything, so how can you help me”. He laughed and said something that astonished me “But I see you alive, I mean you still five senses, all vital organs and a brain to think. You are pretty, young and can take a flight from Delhi to Hyderabad on your own. Indeed as per any human being you are still ALIVE. In short you are living”. But then all of a sudden he gave a frowned eyebrow expression asking or commenting I do not know myself ‘SO YOU THINK YOU ARE LIVING’.

For an hour we were silent until we were served food and I felt to initiate conversation with him around what he meant by ‘So you think you are living’. And he politely responded “If you lose everything but you have a control on yourself you can achieve it back. I mean you are alive. You have skills like we all have but it is just that you have few or may be many things that you have lost but remember you have not lost LIFE. I will not intrude but just tell one thing LIVE and try to feel the essence of LIFE. If you feel that you are not living it is worse than being on death bed. What you lost was not yours and you can recover by doing something so that others do not lose the same thing or fall into the same situation as you are today. In simple words when we cannot set ourselves free we should set others free, that will give you a feeling of freedom.”

I heard him and something was so convincing that for last few months his words echo in my ears. His face, voice and the confidence pushes me to think how can I do what he told me through his words or may be his experiences? I got back to work, I started my life again but with few lifestyle changes as demanded but still I felt something is missing.

So I kept thinking and thinking until this idea to blogging came to my mind. This blog is a place for my friends and strangers to visit and read. With professional and personal commitments, I will post contents around ‘LIFE’. ‘How my ‘LIFE’ changed with few diagnostics’, ‘How I dealt with problems or my trauma’, ‘What I mean when I say ‘Never stop fighting’’, ‘My personal experiences and what I learnt from them’, ‘Real-Life Inspirational Stories’ and ‘Few Videos to enhance the meaning of ‘Life’’.

If I could change one bad thing to good in your life the purpose of my blogging is served. ‘So You Think You Are Living’ is not a question or an expression but a thought that sometimes our sub-cautious mind puts to us.

I am thankful to my ‘HE’ forever for making me understand ‘LIFE’ and this definitely transitioned me from a lily-livered emotional woman to a woman of substance, courage and patience. Over the period of time I have developed as a practical personality to take up this responsibility of re-blogging as a stable blogger.